Natasha Miller’s memoir, Relentless, is a stirring mix of tragedy, tenacity and, ultimately, business success.
The tipping point for San Francisco entrepreneur Natasha Miller came on Christmas morning when she was 16. Her mother chased her around the family home and threatened her with a knife. “It was the Midwest in the mid-1980s, and there was little mental health advocacy and next to no child protective services,” says Miller. “I had a mentally unstable and very angry mother who told me she hated me every day of my life. It was heartbreaking and soulcrushing, as you can imagine.”
On the same Christmas night, her father drove her to a homeless shelter, and she’s been on her own ever since. But, thanks to Miller’s dogged pursuit of success and personal happiness, her compelling story—detailed in the new book Relentless (Amazon)—has a happy ending. Miller, who runs Entire Productions (entireproductions.com), discusses her book and what she learned while foraging through her past.
When did you know you needed to write this important memoir?
I kept my life story under wraps as I built my business. At this point, in 2018, I had enough distance from the lowest inflection points and highest successes in my life in order to reflect and interpret what they all meant to me.
I first started telling my back story at the speakers’ dinner for the Inc. 5000 conference, where founders of up to $1 billion in revenue stopped dead in their tracks and literally leaned in to listen to me. I told them I was practicing telling my story, as I would one day soon tell it to the world. I was completely supported by these people, and that gave me confidence to begin writing about my journey.
What did you learn during your journey that you still use in business? I had always been desperate for someone to see me and save me. The biggest lesson? No one is coming to save you. However, you’re likely able to save yourself, and the moment I realized that, I was free to make things happen for myself and not rely on others. That’s when life kicked into high gear.
The second is that imposter syndrome happens to every single one of us. This feeling relates to your inexperience and lack of confidence. Do the work. I now know the work is where most of the interesting and satisfying experiences take place.
Who was the single best business mentor who guided you early in your career? The earliest mentor I had was a conductor, Dianne Pope. She saw my talent for violin at age 11, plus my ferocious will to succeed. Th at was the catalyst to my getting out of my situation at home and ultimately allowed me to earn three full-ride scholarships for violin performance to the University of Kansas, Drake University and Iowa State—where I was the concertmaster of the symphony. It’s the reason I was able to support myself and, ultimately, start Entire Productions, which I’ve been running for 21 years.
Wall Street Journal and USA Today bestseller Relentless; Natasha Miller.
What did you discover about yourself when writing the book?
Incredible things about myself and my family—none of which would likely have ever been unearthed if I hadn’t been researching this book. Secrets and skeletons came flying out of the tightly sealed closets. Devastatingly deep wounds were both healed and created.
Writing a book about your life is not a neat undertaking. You have to be willing to wade into the water, trudge through the mud and hope for something amazing on the other side. I realized that I had changed the course of history for my entire family with my actions, strength and relentlessness. How did I discover that? My 26-year-old daughter reflected that to me, and she’s not one to wax poetic. I rerouted the course of my family and created a legacy that extends from me through my daughter and into our future generations.
I’m also discovering that I’m not the only entrepreneur with a challenging, heartwrenching story. While researching the book, I discovered that nearly 75% of successful entrepreneurs have suffered through a difficult upbringing, have dealt with familial mental health issues and have had to claw their way out of their own dark hole.
How have readers reacted to the book? They share with me their deepest, darkest stories, which often are still secret. I’m giving them a voice for the first time. It’s ripping open the seams of prideful people who wouldn’t dare utter the details of their past until they see me recounting so many challenging moments in my life.
Many men have read the book and reached out to me. They show me underlined passages and thank me for humanizing mental health. One reader, a male entrepreneur from Arizona, wrote, ‘This is the book I wish I had the courage to write.’ These reactions are so valuable to me—more important to me than the number of books sold, money earned or awards won.
I want my story and this book to have a positive impact on every reader. Maybe it’s a little nudge that moves people from where they are to where they wouldn’t dare to dream of going. I want the reader to know that if I can go through everything I did and get to this point, they can too. There are no real boundaries, only the ones presented to us by others or ourselves.
Photography by: RICCARDO/PEXELS; COURTESY OF NATASHA MILLER
